For all
you golfers, there is a good lesson to be learned here!
Golf is
definitely a thinking man's game!
Way to
go grandpa
A
father, son and grandson go out to the country club for their weekly round of
golf. Just as they reach the first tee, a
beautiful young blonde woman carrying her bag of clubs approaches them. She explains that the member who brought her
to the club for a round of golf had an emergency which called him away and asks
the trio whether she can join them.
Naturally, the guys all agree.
Smiling,
the blonde thanks them and says, "Look, fellows, I work in a bar as an
exotic dancer, so nothing shocks me anymore.
If any of you wants to smoke, have a beer, bet, take a leak, swear or
tell off-color stories or do anything that you normally do when playing a round
together, go ahead. But I enjoy playing
golf, consider myself pretty good at it, so don't try
to coach me on how to play my shots.
"With that the guys agree to relax and invite her to drive
first.
All
eyes are fastened on her shapely behind as she bends to place her ball on the
tee. She then takes her driver and hits
the ball 270 yards down the middle, right in front of the green. The father's mouth is agape. "Wow, that was
beautiful. "The blonde puts her
driver away and says, "I really didn't get into it and I should have faded
it a little. "After the three guys
hit their drives and their second shots (she was closest to the pin) the blonde
takes out a nine iron and lofts the ball within five feet of the hole. The son says, "Damn, lady, you played
that perfectly." The blonde frowns
and says, "it was a little weak. I've left a tricky little putt." After the son buries a long putt for a par,
dad two putts for a bogey and granddad overruns the green with his pitching
wedge, chips back and putts for a double bogey, the blonde taps in the
five-footer for a birdie.
The
guys all congratulate her on her fine game.
She puts her putter back in the bag and says, "Thanks, but I really
haven't played much lately, and I'm a little rusty. Maybe I'll really get into the next
drive." Having the honors she
drives first on the second hole and knocks the hell out of the ball, and it
lands nearly 300 yards away smack in the middle of the fairway. For the rest of the round the statuesque
blonde continues to amaze the guys, quietly and methodically shooting for par
or less on every hole.
When
the get to the 18th green, the blonde is three under par, but has a nasty
12-foot putt on an undulating green for a par.
She turns to the guys and says, "I really want to thank you for not
acting like a bunch of chauvinists and telling me what club to use or how to
play a shot, but I need this putt for a 69 and I'd really like to break 70 on
this course. If any one of you can tell
me how to make par on this hole, I'll take him back to my apartment, pour some
25-year old single malt in him, fix him a dinner and then have sex with him the
rest of the night."
The
yuppie son jumps at the thought. He
strolls across the green, carefully eyes the line of the putt and finally says,
"Honey, aim for about 3 inches to the right of the hole and hit it
firm. It will get over the little hump
and break right into the cup. "
The
father kneels down and sights the putt using his putter as a plumb. "Don't listen to the kid, darling', you
want to hit it softly 10 inches to the right and run it left down that little
hogback, so it falls into the cup."
The
old gray-haired grandfather walks over to the blonde's ball on the green, picks
it up and hands it to her. "That's
a gimme, sweetheart.
Your car or mine?"