When I die, bury me on the golf course so my
husband will visit. ~Author
Unknown
I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew
tomatoes they'd come up
sliced. ~Author Unknown
I've spent most of my life golfing .... the rest
I've just wasted. ~Author
Unknown
They call it golf because all the other
four-letter words were
taken. ~Raymond Floyd
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag
stick on top. ~Pete Dye
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think
they are out having fun. ~Jim Bishop
I'm hitting the woods just great .... but having a terrible time getting
out of them! ~Author Unknown
I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators.
~Gerald Ford
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand
hits in baseball. I did it
in one afternoon on the golf course. ~Hank Aaron
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five.
~Paul Harvey
The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard
cues were allowed on the putting green. ~Ernest Hemingway
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep
the clubs and the fresh air. ~Jack Benny
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?
~Al Boliska
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
~Billy Graham
Reverse every natural instinct and do the
opposite of what you are inclined
to do, and you will probably come very close to
having a perfect golf swing.
~Ben Hogan
Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat
until the ball is in the hole. Have fun. The end. ~Chuck Hogan
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf
ball. ~Jack Lemmon
I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.~ Joe E.
Lewis
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are
still
rolling. ~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill
adapted for the purpose. ~Woodrow Wilson
A golfer's diet: live on greens as much as possible. ~Author Unknown
Gone golfin' ... be back dark thirty. ~Author Unknown
Born to golf. Forced to work. ~Author Unknown
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off. ~Author Unknown
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures .... and not in still waters. ~Author
Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it
straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown
The difference in golf and government is that in
golf you can't improve your
lie. ~George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a
bagpipe ~Author Unknown
